Greetings ladies - 

This post comes to you from Rant Land. You know the place: where everything cranky grows in top notch cow dung. Where you’re tired of everyone’s personal opinions, political objectives and oh-so-self-righteous boasting on everything from your personal life to how to raise your kids. It’s always hot here in Rant Land. People don’t relax. But there sure is a lot of photos taking. “Look at me! Driving like an idiot!” … “Look at me, posing with my husband – the one I never talk to but who looks amazing in his Sunday best! Wow, that Hypocrisy Cologne sure smells good!”

If you’re not my neighbor in Rant Land, this post is not for you.

If you are, maybe you should consider moving. Because really, the real estate values go down the moment you move in. Perhaps, instead of living in such a toxic neighborhood, perhaps you should move into a new neighborhood down the street. It’s called Real Life and I hear it’s lovely.

Real Life vs. Rant Land

In Real Life, people sit face to face to work out problems. People don’t show photos of their food – they actually eat together. And best of all, if you’re trying to get over a bad breakup, you don’t have to see photos of your ex with his new hussy at the beach. Why? Because in Real Life, people need permission to enter your personal space. 

You Don’t Need Facebook

For my ladies out there who have come over from ChristianMingle, it might be tempting to be on Facebook. After all, if you don’t show your status as “single,” how are you ever going to meet someone, right?

The problem with this logic is that you’re not really meeting a real man on Facebook. You’re meeting his personality. Then, after going on a date with him, you’re posting about it on Facebook, rather than sitting at home and, God forbid, deciding for yourself if this is someone you want to see again.

I’m not saying all websites are bad. I’m saying use discretion. After all, ChristianMingle is an online site and it’s responsible for more Christian marriages than any other faith based website. But here’s the difference: ChristianMingle is kind of like one-stop shopping. Once you find amazing ingredients for a lifetime meal, you are done. With Facebook, it’s never ending snacking. And some of the snacking can get you sick. I mean, how many photos do you need to see of preggo mothers posing with their baby bumps on the beach? It’s adorable, and you are likely happy for them, but the truth is… maybe you’re not happy for them. What if you’re having a hard time getting pregnant? What if this mother is someone who stole the love of your life? Sure, you’d like to be mature about it, but jealousy is working against you. Is this helpful for your emotions? I’m going to go out on a limb and say, “Nope.” 

I am getting extreme, yes, but my point is that in searching and lurking and getting into people’s business like a voyeur, we’re not engaged in relationship. Instead, we are engaged in sneaky people watching. This does nothing for the human soul but make us feel worse about what we don’t have. I call it the Compare and Despair Syndrome.

But Facebook is How I Promote Stuff!

Some of you might find Facebook helpful for work and promotional purposes. “It’s how I share news of my book,” one friend said. “Terrific,” I told her, “But there’s a difference between news of your book and news about your new haircut. And frankly, if someone was interested in your book, one time is sufficient. We don’t need to see it 10 times/day because, frankly, that just makes the rest of us writers who aren’t done with our book delay finishing ours.”

I sound cranky. I admit it. But really, how is one supposed to have a big, juicy, creative life if all one does is read sound bytes about someone else’s life? 

For me, I’m limiting Facebook to one day/week – thirty minutes tops. If people want to read articles I’ve written on faith, they can come to Believe.com. If they don’t, I don’t need to be posting them ten times/day on a social media site that will, undoubtedly, suck me into other peoples drama – drama that not only can I not change, but drains my energy.

I have a proposition for you: Limit your time on Facebook. Want to meet someone amazing? Get off your computer. Engage in something spiritual. Volunteer. Walk. Join a new club. I can’t promise you’ll meet your next big crush tomorrow, but you sure aren’t going to do it playing Candy Crush.

Leave a Comment: Who is with me? Or do I just sound like a brat? I want to know. I really do. Leave a comment here for find me on… wait for it….Facebook.

Note: Lest I sound like a hypcrite, this is my business page. It’s not my brag page. And, if it makes you crazy to “Like” one more page, I won’t like you any less if you don’t click that magic button. Be a good steward of your time, friends! Pick and choose what encourages you and stay away from what drains you!