How did a musical theatre performer living in New York City meet a youth pastor from San Diego? And what was it that started their relationship off so strongly that it then led to marriage? Neither Ashley, known as Tre, or I, Miki, thought that an online dating site would be the means that God would use to lead them to the love of their lives, but that’s exactly what happened. They had both been on the site for a few months before they “met”. Ashley had been signed up months before by his friends on another online site that he quickly had no interest in. One night while he was on Facebook, he noticed an ad for ChristianMingle and became intrigued. He perused for a few months until finally someone really caught his attention. The moment he saw her in March of ’09 in her rectangular eye glasses, wearing her Star Trek t-shirt with her hand held up, ring finger and middle finger pulled apart while touching the outside fingers in the Vulcan sign for ‘Live long and prosper’, and the words “I’m a Trekkie” written as a caption, he knew he had to know what made this girl tick.
Meanwhile, I had previewed a few online dating sites and quickly became frustrated. They were not for me. Until, I saw ChristianMingle. I thought at least this way it already narrowed it down to men who shared the most important thing in my life…God. After a few months of scanning the site with the free profile, I noticed I had an email. But I could not read it! I was not paying!! I scoured over Ashley’s profile again and again, trying to read between his lines to get a feel for what kind of man he was. Right away I was laughing! He had me in stitches from the start. The question: what’s your idea of a good trip? was answered with: Do you mean the drug kind or the falling kind? Cuz neither are cool! This hooked me. Not to mention his pictures. I felt a nudging in my spirit to pursue this opportunity further and so I decided to pay for a month so I could write him back!
This began a few short conversations between us which consisted of Star Trek banter and a possible trip to Sacramento as I was going to be working there in the summer. One evening, as Ashley was on the site, he received a notification that he had just been IM’ed…instant messaged…and it was me. He took a deep breath. ‘This is it Lord,’ he thought,’ let’s do this. ‘ An amazing conversation ensued into the wee hours of the night and we both knew this was something different. We felt the Lord’s prodding and assurance throughout each conversation, whether it be easy and fun, or deep and difficult, and made sure to give our new found relationship, whatever it was meant to be, over to Him. We were so grateful for the ability to chat over the internet because it was a safe environment to learn about each other and not be afraid to share. This soon led to phone calls and eventually a first meeting when Ashley decided to fly to NY for a weekend at the end of April. It had been about two months after we initially began chatting. The meeting couldn’t have gone better! We found our chemistry was not only through words and conversations, but now matched equally with our attraction of being together. We immediately felt comfortable with each other as those months of writing and chatting and talking built a solid friendship foundation between us. We decided to court, where we had lots of long distance trips and trying times, but also a relationship of healing and love like we’d never known before. Eventually this led to 9 months after the initial conversation, on Dec. 22nd 2009, Ashley flying to New York City, getting on his knee, and saying the greatest honor of his life would for him to be my husband. On June 7th of 2010 we were married. It was the most beautiful, perfect day of our lives, other than when we first embraced God, and we’re so thankful to Him, our family, our friends, Star Trek, and of course to ChristianMingle.