You’ve been dating for a while, but you still haven’t found “the one.” While signing up for a site like ChristianMingle is a great first step, you also need to think about your dating philosophy. Are you basing your love life more on modern trends or on what God has to say about choosing a partner? The Bible doesn’t exactly address dating head on. However, if you look at certain passages, it’s easier to gain an understanding of what God wants when it comes to our romantic relationships. Here are some examples of what the Bible says about dating.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” —Proverbs 3:5-6
Most people like to think they’re in total control of their own love life. It’s especially easy to see it this way when you’re searching for potential partners online. Before you even meet someone face to face, you get to size them up and make a judgement call about whether they’re worth your time.
While it’s smart to consider the pros and cons of potential dates, it’s important to remember that we need to step back and let God show us the way sometimes. Are you trusting God to lead you to your future spouse? Or are you pushing back on the direction he’s pushing you towards? God knows which partner is your best match, so take time to really listen to him when you’re dating.
Become A Worthy Partner
“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” —Romans 12:2
So much of modern dating is focused on finding the right person. We make up lists in our heads of what our ideal partner would be like – their appearance, their job, their age, their personality, etc. For many, the goal is simply to find the person who checks off all the boxes on their ever-growing list.
But the Bible instructs us to approach our relationships in a different way. Instead of looking for the right person for you, we should focus on becoming the right person for someone else. Are you working on yourself to make sure you’ll be a great spouse for your future husband or wife? How will you help meet your future spouse’s needs? Focus on meeting God’s will for you as an individual; it’s the best way to ensure that you’ll be ready for your future spouse when they walk into your life.
Value Your Body
“Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” —1 Corinthians 6:18-20
The Bible is pretty clear about sex and the fact that it’s best when reserved for marriage. But remember that this isn’t just a strict rule that comes with the territory of being a Christian; instead, it’s a mindset of seeing your body as a temple of the Holy Spirit.
Temptations are going to be strong when you’re dating someone you really like; that’s just part of being human. But it can help to remember the true meaning behind the Bible’s urging to hold off on sexual intimacy. It’s not something God just made up to serve as a test of faithfulness; instead, it’s a reminder that our bodies have value, and that being careful with how we use them is a way to glorify God.
Are you following the Bible’s teachings about dating? It takes some close reading to see it, but God’s Word offers plenty of tips for dating successfully.
You may also be interested in What The Bible Says About Physical Beauty & Attraction
God bless the writer!
This is about the best article any writer can come up with by extrapolating Bible verses to overlay on our modern-day dating scene. In Bible times there was no dating! Marriages were arranged by families. The story of Jacob being given Leah in marriage, when his heart was set on Rachael, is scant endorsement of romantic love. Assuming the feelings were mutual, Rachael had no easy time of it, waiting out that 7 years. (And there were no cosmetics back then, so the aging process took it’s toll on Rachael’s beauty . . . )
In the New Testament Jesus wasn’t much help; understandably he was on a mission that precluded a family life. St. Paul isn’t much help either. He counsels that it’s better to marry than to burn. (Whether he means to burn with passion or to burn in Hadees, isn’t clear so this is no ringing endorsement of romantic love leading to marriage!)
So we’re back to overlaying positive Bible passages with this sensitive area of our lives. That’s the best we can do, given how much of modern life was far beyond the imagination of the writers of scripture. Prayer helps as well.
I need more faith-based questions for my application. What would you ask your prospective partner about his/her religious beliefs? Is it enough to learn you are both Christians? I don’t think so. I’d like to have a separate section in my Question Bank for faith-related questions so partners could explore much deeper if their religious views and worship practices will make them compatible. You want to have a partner who will strengthen your faith not diminish it. Please contribute your questions on http://www.self-match.com