The prisoner that it really frees is you. —Matthew West in “Forgiveness.”

It’s those people I pray for.
Over and over.

Those I forgive - 

The ones who don’t deserve it. 

The ones I bring {I drag} to the foot of the cross and release and find freedom from. Only to find I’ve picked back up again.   

The ones who have taken things that can never ever be repaid. Who did it, knowing better. With angry hearts.

Who have been the focus of layered tears and prayers. The people who make me wonder, “Maybe they don’t know better? Surely no one could act like this and know …”

Other days though, I could fling it, without a second thought. I bring it right to Him. And whether they know what they do or not, and whether they will do it again or not, is none of my worry. I trust Him with it all. I trust Him with them. And I say, through tears, “You saw it, right?  Just what was done. Just what was taken. All of the tears, they were not for naught, right? Tell me you know.”

And I hear Him whisper, “Forgive as you have been forgiven.” Suddenly I am hit with the truth that He knows how I feel. Exactly how I feel.  

Because this is what I’ve done to Him. To God.

Well, not this. What they’ve done is far worse. Never would I do this …  

Oh, yes. This. This is how I’ve treated God.

And just like that, those people, whom I couldn’t comprehend minutes earlier, are just like me. We are the same. And that alone makes me want to run and never turn back.

But now I know this is exactly when I have to lay it down, because He knows.  

Because what He laid down for me is far bigger than what my shame feels like at the moment.  

He reminds me of who I am and whose I am. And even though it feels like what is gone could never be repaid, it is the God of the universe who tells me He can restore.  

He will repay for the years the locusts have eaten. In His way, in His time. 

So, again I say “yes” to Him, glad that He again says “yes” to me.

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. —Lamentations 3:22, NIV

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