Does it seem like your love life is in a rut? Do you feel like people don’t notice you, or are maybe even put off by you? Here’s the thing: It might be all in your head. The right person is out there waiting for you, but you first have to realize that you are God’s gift to YOU!

Learn to Love Yourself

As Christians, it is all too easy for us to confuse healthy humility with unhealthy self-loathing. To be humble means to act with modesty and respect, and regard everyone around us as equals — even that really annoying guy at the office. Being humble doesn’t mean learning to hate yourself or focus on your flaws. 

In trying to conquer pride, sometimes we go too far. To learn to love yourself again, you will — at least at first — need to be constantly aware of the thoughts that enter your mind. “I’m so stupid,” “I can’t get anything right,” “I hate my body” or “My life stinks” may seem like relatively harmless thoughts, but when they are constantly parading around in your head, you can’t help but dislike yourself. Be aware of your thoughts and counter negative ones with positive ones. For example, if you’re trying to squeeze into your favorite jeans and immediately think “I hate my thighs,” counter it with something like “thank God I have beautiful eyes!”

For God So Loved the World That He Gave YOU, Too!

Find your path in life. Countless people spend untold amounts of energy trying to nail down one purpose or one calling, but there’s a very real possibility that you could have many. Open your heart to God’s will and He will put you on your path. Embrace each “calling” as it comes your way. Every one of us is truly unique. We are created with an exact combination of gifts and graces never duplicated throughout all eternity. You were born on this planet exactly when and where you needed to be, not just for one reason, but for innumerable reasons. Your challenge is to see yourself as God sees you so that you may become all the gift God created you to be.   

Be a Faithful Servant

Serving God is part of the package. Paul instructed the Romans:

Be not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord… Romans 12:11

Not everyone has the same gifts, so don’t feel pressured to do exactly what someone else is doing. You don’t need to be a millionaire philanthropist to be doing God’s will. Serve God as best you can, for God’s sake and for His kingdom. Whatever you do, do it well. Do it with a love for others. Perhaps one day, you’ll look to your side and notice someone working with you. Or you may find your soul mate in another way. Let God bring His gift in His way and in His time. 

Keep Your Eyes — And Your Heart — Open

Sometimes, it’s very difficult to be patient and let God work in His time. Loneliness is a powerful emotion and can be a true test of faith for some people. Use your “season of singleness” to work on you. Finish your degree, get in shape, travel, learn how to knit, do whatever you want to do so you can be the best Christian you can be and the best spouse you can be. Love yourself, use your gifts and keep serving God. As long as you keep your eyes and your heart open, you won’t miss the wonderful person that God has waiting for you.

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