There are several ways that being guarded is actually hurting you. It may seem ironic, but too much guarding of the heart can actually keep you from something truly great. Being too guarded builds walls hard to cross, prevents us from falling in love and could lead to regret from not allowing ourselves to fall for the person right in front of us. At the same time, being a little cautious seems necessary in today’s modern dating culture, where trust is taking the backseat.
What does God mean when He says to guard and protect our hearts? In the end, we need to bring down our walls in order to see the blessings right in front of us.
Break Down Your Walls
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” —Proverbs 4:23
Relationships should be a pure, joyous and noble pursuit. At the same time, God knows that pain is inevitable in one way or another in our lifetime. So, by guarding your heart, which could entail the act of praying, choosing your words wisely or refraining from being physical in the beginning, you are protecting yourself from a deeper pain if the relationship didn’t work out. It’s okay to do this.
Having walls is almost natural. We all build them with the intent of not getting hurt, but what did these walls ever accomplish? Are we actually missing out on life because of the walls we put up around our hearts?
Our walls are often more delicate than strong; they are fragile because we build them with fragile hearts. However, if we were to allow God to be the only mighty fortress in our lives, I think we wouldn’t shy away from the happenstances of life. Instead, we would trust in our God, our rock and mighty fortress, to see us through it – heartache included.
Time To Let Go
“But forget all that—it is nothing compared to what I am going to do.” —Isaiah 43:18
To some degree, building walls blocks us from falling in love. The more we guard, the more we block emotion for another human being. As a result, we almost become emotionless when it comes to a relationship; we’ll wonder, why can’t I feel anything? Why can’t I fall as quickly as him? Why am I so slow?
It’s good to ask yourself these questions, because the hard truth may be that you simply need to let go. You need to let go of the pain from the past, in order to fully – and excitedly – pursue your future. God surely does have a future for us all, and it is good and pleasing (Romans 12:2) for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. We don’t want to live with a regret of not fully pursuing someone because we guarded ourselves to the point of not allowing ourselves to fall in love.
In the end, we do need to tear down our walls in order to see what lies in front of us. It could be the greatest blessing of our lives, and yet, we’re veiling them with fear from getting hurt. Allow the walls to fall into the wasteland; they have no room in the future. Fill your life with the faithfulness of God, the courage to love and the boldness to step into it. God is doing something even greater for you, and it doesn’t revolve around your past.
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