Marriage is a beautiful thing — but it also takes a lot of work, a lot of patience and a lot of boundaries. Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend, counselors and authors of the award-winning best-seller Boundaries, teach couples how to apply what they have identified as the “10 Laws of Boundaries” to marriage and relationships in their book Boundaries in Marriage. 

Among other things, readers will learn when to say yes and when to say no when it comes to their spouse and when it comes to other people. You will learn how to truly know and respect each other’s needs, choices and freedom and to draw appropriate boundary lines to live as individuals. 

What is are Boundaries?

A boundary is merely a means to help you determine where someone’s control — such as your spouse’s control — begins and ends. It is not a tool to help you control someone else. With that said, once good boundaries are put in place, they can make a good marriage even better or save a rocky marriage.

The Benefits of Boundaries

Having proper boundaries in place can help husbands and wives understand the little things — and big things — which can be a source of friction, hurt or betrayal as well as how to heal and move past them into a place of mutual care, respect, affirmation and intimacy. Couples that read this book together will learn how to set and maintain their own personal boundaries, respect their spouse’s boundaries, establish mutual Godly values and protect their marriage from outside influences. However, this is not a “how-to” book. There is no simple formula or laundry list of things to check off and forget. It is a guide to help you and your spouse through a transforming process to heal and change your mind and heart.

How Does God Play a Role in Setting Boundaries in Our Relationships?

All of the advice in this book is based on Scripture and there are numerous verses and biblical references. Some readers have complained that it’s too Scripture-heavy, but if you feel that is the case, you can skim over the verses and skip to the more meaty portions of the book. If, however, you feel like you need to truly make God the head of your household, the Scriptural references can be very helpful to you.

How ‘Boundaries’ Has Helped Couples

Boundaries in Marriage has gotten rave reviews on websites like Amazon.com, Christianbook.com and Goodreads.com. Readers have given the book an average of 4.5 out of 5 stars, and have left comments like, “This book literally saved my marriage,” “Very easy to understand,” “I wish I had read this book sooner” and “I recommend this book to any couple, married or courting.” Reviewers have described the book as “practical,” “helpful,” “valuable,” “clear” and “a must-read.” 

Other Reading Materials to Consider

If you and your spouse enjoy the Boundaries in Marriage book, you can continue on your journey with the Boundaries in Marriage Workbook and Boundaries in Marriage DVD Curriculum. If you feel so moved to start a book study at your church, you can even check out the Boundaries in Marriage Participant’s Guide.

Even if you feel like your marriage is wonderful, you should definitely check this book out. It may be just what you’re looking for to make your relationship everything you dreamed it would be.