One of the significant characteristics that I have noticed with leaders is that many have difficulty asking for help. Acknowledging they need help sometimes leaves leaders feeling vulnerable, causing them to feel isolated and confused. In addition, it is often challenging for leaders because of the perceptions that they think others have of them.
The truth is that not dealing with life’s challenges, can lead to greater difficulties.
What leaders have a hard time admitting is that we all have struggles at one time or another, that may supersede our abilities to handle them alone. Naturally, life ebbs and flows. Some days are great, and some not so good.
The same goes for seasons in life. Seasons can be wonderful and yet, some can be extremely challenging. Some of the most difficult times for leaders include: marital problems, co-worker issues or relationship challenges, struggles with parents or children, financial stress, job loss, life transition or addictions.
If you live long enough something will come up that you might not feel equipped to handle effectively on your own. Some leaders will seek out the help of someone that can assist them through the process. Yet, many will have difficulty asking for help. What is so challenging for these leaders and why are the words “I need help” so hard?
Here are some possible reasons:
Fear: Leaders sometimes fear what others may think of them.
Pride: Asking for help might mean they don’t have it all together.
Trust: Difficulty trusting other people.
Shame: Admitting a problem might mean facing tough areas in their life.
Control: Leaders may believe admitting weakness equates to loss of control.
Whatever the reasons may be, here are some things to keep in mind:
You are not alone. At some time or another we all have challenges in our lives that we must overcome. God did not create us to live in isolation. He created us to live in community that we would help one another. If we can’t live out authentic faith in the church, where can we live it out?
Admitting we need help is liberating. Recognize that you can benefit from someone coming alongside of you to help. It can be extremely beneficial for your well-being, impacting not only you, but also your family, ministry and co-workers. Getting the help we may need can help us gain a better perspective, leading to greater clarity and insight.
Getting the help we need is empowering. When you are able to successfully navigate the challenges before you, this is extremely powerful. It can result in you becoming a better and more effective leader.
God desires wonderful things for your life. You are His leader destined for His purposes. God speaks to each of us. Is He whispering anything to you now? If so, I encourage you to go forward and do what He is speaking to your heart.