You’ve pored over their ChristianMingle profile, thought hard about what you have in common and crafted the perfect introductory email. You feel a surge of confidence the moment you hit “Send,” but then the inevitable happens. Every passing hour that a reply doesn’t appear, you feel a little more defeated.

There isn’t always a magic solution for getting a reply to your email. In many cases, it’s just a case of an inactive member who hasn’t even read your message yet. However, there are a few things you can do to increase your chances of getting a reply. Here’s a guide to making that first impression really count and, hopefully, hearing back from the person who’s caught your eye.

1. Pay Attention To The Profile

It’s important to show that you’ve really taken the time to consider whether the person you’re contacting is a good fit for you. When writing your email, make it clear that you’ve paid attention to the details in his or her profile. Mention common interests and ask a question. For example, if the profile mentions that this member is a Stephen King fan, ask which of his books is their favorite? You could even share yours to show that it’s a interest you two share. Because ChristianMingle has lots of opportunities for members to include these details on their profiles, it should be easy for you to find out which singles are actually a potential match.

Adding this kind of personal detail to your email is key because it shows an interest in that member on a personal level while also revealing something about yourself. It also makes it clear that you don’t have a stock email that you’re sending out to random people on the site.

2. Showcase Your Personality

Lots of online dating advice will mention making a joke or keeping a fun, light tone for that first email. But guess what? The same shtick doesn’t work for everyone, which is why being true to yourself is much more important when crafting a message to someone who interests you.

Instead of pulling a gimmick, think about your personality. How do you chat with friends and family? Are you a funny gal? Then, by all means, crack a joke in your email. But if that’s not really you, don’t feel like you have to play the entertainer. Maybe you’re sarcastic, or sincere, or shy. Re-read your message before sending and ask if it really sounds like you. If not, you have some rewriting to do.

3. Find A Way To Stand Out

You might think that keeping things simple and uncomplicated in the first email is a good rule of thumb. But providing too little detail can also be a deal-breaker. If someone reads your short and sweet message, they might think it’s nice but not intriguing enough to write back. That’s why it’s a good idea to mention something about yourself that makes you stand out from the crowd.

Not sure what your “special thing” is? Take some time to think about your life as a whole to see what has made you into the person you are today. Lots of people assume that your stand-out factor has to be an amazing skill or a super-rare hobby. But it could also just be a fun fact about your life, like growing up with five siblings, taking a road trip along the East Coast during college or having the same best friend since grade school. To you, these are familiar parts of your everyday life, but to others, they provide a glimpse into who you are as a person. It could be that kind of small detail that makes or break your first email.

Above all else, your first message should be something that only you could write. Read it over once more and ask if this message could have come from any other member. If there’s no personal twist on your email, you might get passed over. Just remember: the biggest mistake you can make with a first email is to never send one at all. Take your chances and reach out; you might just meet the person you’re meant to be with.

You may also be interested in The 4 Best Ways To Meet Someone On ChristianMingle

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