You might have guessed it: I want to talk with you about sex. Yes, this can be very taboo in the Christian community at times, but the world talks about it every chance they get… and usually in a twisted way that is not aligned with God’s original purpose. So, I’m seizing this platform to rejoice in and talk about God’s desire for this beautiful gift to mankind.
I also recognize that this might be a painful topic for some of you to face, but would you ask the Holy Spirit to give you courage to read through to the end? Invite Him to illuminate your mind and heart to listen to what He wants you to hear and apply in your life.
What’s the purpose of sex? In no way am I an expert, and I’m going to oversimplify here: sex was created to glorify God by pleasurably bringing husband and wife together in unity in all aspects and to procreate to fill the earth (Genesis 1:27-28). Recently I met with a new mentor and she shared that sex is God’s wedding gift intended to be a gift that keeps on giving for a lifetime in a marriage.
Here’s the question: do you want a wonderful sex life that glorifies God, is pleasing and life giving to both your spouse and to you, and advances the Kingdom of God?
Can I say “yes” loud enough?!?!
Maybe you’re thinking: “That’s great, Cristina, but what does that have to do with me now? I’m not married yet.”
This is precisely where I want to challenge you. We aren’t helpless and our hands are not tied. What we do and how we live NOW has tremendous potential to pave the way for future joy in this area.
Proverbs 29:18 tells us “Where there is no revelation, people cast off restraint; but blessed is the one who heeds wisdom’s instruction.”
Catch God’s desire for purity for you and your spouse because of His great love for you!! If you truly get wisdom and understanding from God in this, you will not be prone to “cast off restraint” during your pre-marriage days and you will be blessed if you heed “wisdom’s instruction.”
If you said “YES!” to desiring a God-glorifying sex life, then it will be much easier for you to say “NO!” to anything that will hinder that “yes” from becoming a reality. If you marry then you can be sure that it is God’s will for you to glorify Him with your spouse in your sexual relations (like in every other area of your marriage).
Let’s get specific here: regardless of your relationship status right now, you aren’t married yet, so keep yourself from doing anything that you would regret once you are married. Maybe you’re not struggling physically, but maybe it is the area of impure and lustful thoughts. Regardless, it is up to you to open yourself up to the Holy Spirit and ask for wisdom and guidance to see how this translates into your particular situation (Psalm 139:23-24). It could be that you are experiencing freedom and healthiness.
Wonderful! Stay humble and pray for your future spouse to walk in this freedom too.
In our singlehood, we are learning how to flex our spiritual muscles to fight for purity because in marriage (especially) we must fight for oneness and purity with our spouse. The enemy HATES this and, as you’ve probably noticed, he desires to steal from, kill, and destroy marriages (John 10:10). Let’s take this training ground seriously, but not with an anxious heart, because Jesus has overcome the world (John 16:33) and equips us with everything good for doing His will (Hebrews 13:20-21).
This is my prayer for you: Holy Spirit, thank you for being our Counselor and for leading us into all truth. Thank you for your perfect love that casts out all fear and for loving us through pruning and times of discipline. Help us to humble ourselves and submit to your loving guidance. Please help us to build one another up as well as we seek you with all our hearts. Amen.
*This article was originally written/published by the author under the title “A Little Taboo.”