Family restoration can take years, decades even. It’s not ideal for it to take that long, but pride, anger, bitterness, selfishness and pain can block restoration from happening for decades. A whole life can pass by without ever having spoken a word of forgiveness. So, what does restoration look like? How does it happen for a broken, modern family?

Let God Help You Heal

Family restoration doesn’t look or smell like roses all of the time. It’s hard. Sometimes, it’s still messy and sometimes bickering may still ensue. But amidst all of the little holes of your family, who fills them? Our God who is sovereign fills the holes of pain. Our God who is holy fills the holes of resentment. Our God who is mightier than we could imagine fills the holes of a big, messy family. He created family to be at peace, not strife.

“Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame.”  —Song of Solomon 8:6

Love – Even From Afar

You may not see each other as frequently, or you may not even see each other much at all, but is the forgiveness breathing in your hearts? Is open love sitting heavy inside your soul for one another? That’s what matters. Distance is time, it’s miles, but love travels even overseas without a boat or a plane. Allow forgiveness to occur over time by thinking of your family with love rather than resentment.

“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”  —Matthew 6:14-15

The Search For Peace

Restoration of a family feels like peace; it could be sudden, or it may take time. However, the peace is inherently real and it’s present. It’s God-given, because it’s undeniable that God also delights in those families who forgive to restore their peace with one another and do life together with joy.

“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”  —Romans 12:18

You may all still be healing little by little from the brokenness that your family was, but you are no longer broken. That is the healing power of our God; He heals the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Our God is a God who restores broken relationships, broken marriages and broken families, and who heals the past with His seal of forgiveness and love. Love is as strong as death, so why can’t it overcome a broken family? Why can’t it heal your heart from the past? It can. Allow it in your heart. God says it can.

You may also be interested in Moving Past Pain: How To Use Your Sadness

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