Being single again can feel like you’re walking on a tight rope, trying to balance your emotions in one hand, and your everyday life in another. How do you navigate this thin line and, more importantly, how can you navigate it to find hope again?

The answer is to realize that inside of you rests the most beautiful truth of your singleness. Understand that you must put up a fight against desperation. Realize only you have the authority to not let anyone steal the light and joy of your life.

Call on God

In an ideal world, hope is always wearing a smile, feeling confident in God’s timing and will, and never wavering in doubt. Unfortunately, that’s not quite what our lives look like even when we consider ourselves hopeful. We often have moments when we’re wandering in the dark, wearing a smile, but still feeling doubtful.

So, how do you balance on this tight rope? You simply don’t. You were never designed to juggle your emotions like an acrobat juggles with fire. Everything is not okay, and you’re still a human with an aching heart. Sometimes the only thing you can do is call on God. “Call to me in times of trouble. I will save you, and you will honor me” (Psalm 50:15).

Your heart has been through a long, rough journey. The last thing you need to do is try to balance your emotions and put on a brave face. But there rests the nature of God; God meets you at your brokenness and pain. He meets you in that pain. “He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds. He counts the stars and names each one. Our Lord is great and very powerful. There is no limit to what he knows” (Psalm 147:3-5).

Repair And Prepare

During a difficult breakup, it’s important to remember that your singleness was designed for your heart to repair and prepare. That’s not to say for another relationship necessarily, but to repair and prepare your heart for whatever good thing God has in store for you. You’re readying yourself to see it, walk into it and by blessed by it.

One thing to understand is that inside of you lies the beauty of your singleness, and it’s all wrapped up in the identity of Jesus. In your singleness, the beauty rests in you; that you are a wonderful and holy creation consecrated to one God who will never let you go. That truth should never leave you.

Fight Desperation

You also have to put up a fight against desperation. You will either find yourself confident in God’s ultimate plan or leaning into the cycle of dating for the sake of dating.  If it’s the latter, you’ll end up feeling doubtful yet again. This is a vicious cycle, one you don’t want to find yourself in. Fight it with intentional dating, and really think about whether you think someone might be right for you or you’re only dating to avoid loneliness.

You need to realize that only you have the authority to not let anyone steal the light and joy of your life. Yes, you will have a season of sorrow, but joy is always waiting for you to jump in. Don’t let your season of sorrow start stealing the joy you deserve to have. “So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy” (John 16:22).

You may also be interested in 4 Ways To Find Love Again After Past Relationships Have Failed