Have you found it nearly impossible to settle into a great relationship? You’re not alone. Some people get lucky and find a partner they want to spend the rest of their lives with fast and early, but others wade through the dating scene indefinitely, falling short of any meaningful relationship for one reason or another.

Everyone has their own approach, their own reasons, and their own desires for a relationship, but generally, there are five things holding people back:

1.    You don’t know what you want. It could be that you don’t know what you really want in a relationship. You find a partner, and they seem great, but for some reason you can’t quite put your finger on, something seems off, so you move on. Take a moment to think critically about your actual wants and needs, and don’t go for cliches. Learn something about yourself.

2.    You’re too picky. There’s no such thing as a perfect partner. That sexy, charming, caring, wealthy partner you idealize will never exist. Everyone has flaws, faults, bad habits, and a tendency to make mistakes. If you’re too picky, you’ll never find someone suitable to be in a relationship with. Prioritize.

3.    You’re intimidated by commitment. This is hard to quantify, but some people are simply intimidated by the idea of settling down with someone. It could be a fear of getting hurt or a bad experience in the past—whatever it is, it can cripple you if you aren’t prepared to overcome it.

4.    You aren’t looking in the right places. If you’re looking for a homebody to spend quiet nights in with, searching for a partner in bars late at night probably isn’t the best strategy. Look in different places relevant to the type of person you’d like to meet.

5.    You’re too concerned with finding a relationship. Don’t obsess over finding a perfect relationship. Focus on having fun in the dating scene, and let the rest happen naturally.

Once you know and address these five obstacles to finding a great relationship, you’ll have a much easier time dating—and eventually, you’ll fall into one. It’s not easy for everyone, but it is possible for everyone


Sheila Blagg is a Divorce Mediator certified  through the Ohio Supreme courts, & founder & CEO of Divorce 2 Dating, the first social networking site for individuals navigating a divorce. Follow Sheila on Twitter and Facebook!

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