Dedicated to Stacy and Gregg – because you are awesome. Even if you don’t have a Starbucks on your farmr.
Finding the right guy is one thing. Keeping him is quite another.
As a TV writer who thought I could write my own marriage script, I did okay for a while. It was just me, alone with my Award Winning Romance Teleplay, “Delusions: It’s Not Me It’s You.” I was so happy… so content…I figured the Fade Out would never happen.
Lo and behold, Fade In some new actors – under age no less – in the form of a baby boy and a baby girl.
The set got filthy dirty.
There was studio cook, no make-up artist, and certainly no clean up crew. My luck finally ran out and I had nowhere to exit but stage left. Buh-bye, La La Land!
Luckily, God lives in eternity, not some Hollywood McMansion on Sunset.
For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations. – Psalm 100:5
Wow, a director who cares about me, even when I get the dialouge wrong! (It was all me after all, baby!) And, as fate God would have it, he sent a loving couple my way to show me how to live life right when time got tough on this control freak. This new leading lady, along with her handsome hubby, were just the mentor couple I needed to navitage my new life script.
Here’s 10 tips this fabulous couple taught me
1. Set boundaries: “I do” doesn’t mean “I do everything you tell me to.” Saying no to inappropriate activity or talk is saying “yes” to a healthy marriage.
2. Don’t say sorry unless you mean it: Being angry is part of the marriage deal. As spouses, we don’t need to throw a lead actor tantrum. For ex: My friend once dumped milk over her spouse. But guess what, he didn’t dump her. Why? She was truly sorry afterwards and said so. Take note: Because she had set boundaries on other issues (more appropriately, I will add) he knew he could trust her to mean what she said.
3. You’re the lead, not the supporting players: In today’s day and age, it’s easy (and even encouraged) to give the kids run of the set. Stacy, who has five (count ’em) FIVE kids on a farm, showed through example that SHE was the leading lady, not the boys. She made sure they were aware of the contract. It read something like this. “I birthed you, so that’s that. No signature required.”
4. Don’t worry about last minute line changes: Life has a sneaky way of changing on a dime. People die. Jobs are lost. Keep smiling ’cause Jesus has a plan!
5. Bad weather or not, the show must go on: As a homeschooler, Stacy was awesome at keeping a schedule. Rain, shine, pigs being born, dogs getting loose… didn’t matter. Her kids education came first. Priorities were never a problem for Stacy.
6. Not everyone will memorize their lines: Not everyone will respond the way you want them to. Why? You don’t get to write their script. The only author? Jesus. Deal with it.
7. No one died from a peanut butter and jelly sandwich dinner: It’s a true fact of a celebrity’s life that they will not die from lack of a gourmet meal. Neither will the other actors. If manna from heaven is not available, stick to a sandwich. Bonus points if the kids make it themselves!
8. There’s always tutoring on the set: Education is key, from Biblical study to academic prowess. See #5.
9. Sometimes it’s a low budget production: Not everyone can afford a limo or a house cleaner. Just because there isn’t a lot of funding doesn’t mean there isn’t a lot of love.
10. Don’t Burn Out before you Fade Out: Don’t do so much you don’t enjoy what you have.
Thank you, Stacy and Gregg, for such a well choreographed production. With all those kids, on a farm set no less, you really showed this Hollywood gal how to do it right. And when things didn’t go perfectly for you, you shared all the behind-the-scenes. That fact alone made it all the more authentic and special. I am so glad you were my mentors.
What? You didn’t get that contract in the mail? God must have signed it for you.
Until next time, have a great week, everyone. And get yourself a mentor!
Andrea